Jill’s Story: Having a High Need Twin

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I am a mom of 11 1/2 month old twin daughters and one of my twins is what I would call a high need baby. I was so excited to be having my daughters but quickly realized that my life was going to be more complicated than I ever expected.

My daughters were born 4 weeks early and spent almost a full month in the hospital. We live in a smaller community so were away from home which made things more stressful than I ever expected. While in the hospital, we found out that Keri but not Kenzie was lactose intolerant. I had no idea what I was in for once we got home.

The girls did not want to sleep in their own beds so for the first couple of months they were home my husband and I each took one of the girls and slept with them. When they were 3 months old, they seemed fine to be in their own beds and even slept through the night some nights.

Then something strange happened. Kenzie (the older twin) started sleeping through the night and Keri did not. Keri was getting up any where from 1 – 10 times a night. The only way they would go to sleep was if we were holding them and usually feeding them their last bottle was what it took. Neither of them would self-soothe.

I was worried at how many times I was getting up at night. I made an appointment with a Pediatrician and found out that he felt Keri was high-strung. We tried everything we could think of. We read books. We talked to other parents. No one else seemed to be going through what we were.

I just recently started back at work and the girls started daycare. The girls started out fine, then after the first few days, Keri became difficult. After a week, our daycare told us that they could not care for our daughters and we had two weeks to find other arrangements. This is where I stand now; less than two weeks to find a daycare and not sure where to turn.

My mother has kindly offered to watch the girls when she can until I find something else. I feel so alone most days because there really isn’t much help out there for mom’s that deal with high needs babies. I wish any mother who has a high need baby the best of luck.


Holly Klaassen has been running The Fussy Baby Site since 2007. Inspired to start the site after giving birth to her second child, the site aims to provide support and information to parents of fussy, colicky, high need or 'spirited' babies and kids. The main message of this site? You are not alone! When Holly isn't writing for The Fussy Baby Site, she can be found writing for other businesses on topics related to digital marketing, social media, business, and of course, parenting.

Category: Colic

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  1. Jen says:

    i feel ur pain, somewhat. I have a HN 2 1/2 yr old HN daughter. Didn’t fully sleep through night till 9 mos. Screamed whenever anyone else held her until she was 18 mos old despite what we did. Play dates, baby sitters, etc. She is still a terrible sleeper and completely have up naps by 15 mos old. I am a SAHM. I now have 2 mo old b/g twins…the girl has severe colic. She is just like my first daughter (except colic is even worse!!) so I now have 2 HN children and one of those screams 24/7.. In order to get away, I either have to get 2 baby sitters or bring one kid with me because no one person can handle it all. I do, but only because I have to. Just know u r not alone in ur struggles.

  2. Aw, this was a very nice post. Taking a few minutes and actual effort to generate a superb article…
    but what can I say… I procrastinate a whole lot and never seem to get anything done.

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