co-sleeping

[Mbrown602]

My daughter just turned 8 weeks today and we've had the hardest time getting her to bed the last few weeks. She will not go to sleep in her crib and stay alseep any earlier than 11:30 or midnight. She will fall asleep sometimes by 7 or 8 but when you put her in the crib she will not sleep longer than 10 min.

I usually spend hours trying to soothe her to sleep till I just get so tired that I put her in bed with me and that does the trick. I have played white noise, gave her a pacifier, rocked her for hours, put her in the swing, sang to her, gave her to dad, laid her on my chest but none of this works. Anymore she just wants to sleep with me. So I will let her and my husband will put her in the crib about two hours later when she's in a deep sleep. Then when she gets up for her morning bottle, same thing. I can't get her back to sleep unless I put her in bed with me.

Has anyone else had this kind of problem? I told  my husband we can't do this too much longer. Pretty soon she will get to the age where she will start rolling all over the place. Any suggestions on how to break this habit?

[Mbrown602]

Yes, the swaddling seemed to work the first few weeks, but now that she's 8 weeks I've noticed that's not as effective any more. I take her to the dr. tomorrow so I'm going to ask her about this. It seems this baby has a hard time soothing herself to sleep.

And what the five S's again? sucking, swaddling, swinging, shhshing and ?

[Hollyadmin]

side lying!

Are you actually able to sleep when she's in bed with you? You could always put up one of those toddler rails to keep her in the bed...

[Maureen]

We had a similar problem and our baby was so miserable because of dairy in my diet (which we didn't know until she was five weeks old) that we took her into our bed because we couldn't get her to sleep and were too tired to walk with a screamer anymore. So from week 2-10 she has been in our bed. Then she started becoming frustrated without being able to move, louder in the middle of the night and hated the swaddle. So, we tried her crib again...three nights of great work and sleep---easy as pie. Then Easter day was a mess, no nap in her crib and we've spent the last week with her in our bed again and fighting to get her down in her crib for nap time. I don't have any answers but I wanted you to know that we are in the same boat. I think we have high maintenance babies and am convinced we have tried all the things the book says and are still good mommies. I am going to buy the co-sleeper for a little more room and security and will continue to push naptime in the crib. Build on the 10 minutes...eventually it'll grow--ours did. I'll let you know how we progress. I'm glad to know I'm not alone.

[Mbrown602]

Holly, I don't sleep real well when the baby is in bed I think because I'm so afraid of rolling on her. And I notice she has a way of moving closer and closer to me throughout the night. The bad sleep is starting to get to me. This past week, she has been waking up now when my husband tries to transfer her to the crib in the middle of the night and we end up putting her back in bed. So now, she's been in bed with me all night.

We did not plan to have a family bed. I go back to work Monday, and the crappy quality sleep and frequent wakings I'm sure will not help. The sad part is, she was sleeping well in her crib at night until more recently -- it may have taken forever for her to go to sleep, but once she did she was in there for 6 to 7 hours. Now, some nights she behaves like she's 2 or 3 weeks old again.

[Mbrown602]

Maureen, I was thinking of buying a co-sleeper too. I don't want the family bed, but for now it appears this baby is giving us no choice. Let me know how it works out.

[crissy]

I had similar issues, we ended up having matthew sleep with us. It was either get up all the time or get some sleep and so he is now 8mo and still sleeps with us, we have a bed rail as to not worry about him falling out and he sleeps between me and the bed rail.  He will go in a crib occasionally and I keep that right next to the bed.  It is a pack and play but it does its job because I dont have to get out of bed to get him and sometimes that closeness is enough.  I wish I could give you some suggestions but I am hoping that he will transition when he is ready to. I have a friend whose son started sleeping in his crib on his own at about 10-11 months and another whose daughter has her bed in thier room.

[FebMommy]

I use a co-sleeper and early each morning my three month old likes to sleep with me..so I put him face down on my chest and make sure his nostrils are unobstructed and we usually sleep very well....he has trouble sleeping flat and on his back (though safest) because of reflux, etc...so we put our car seat in the co-sleeper and he sleeps in that..it is much more snug and elevates his upper body so his reflux doesn't bother him so.  I also always swaddle and use a pacifier for sleeping.  We have the white noise machine but it doesn't work for him...I rub little concentric circles gently on his forehead with my finger and this lulls him to sleep.  Don't misunderstand, it's never easy 

[fbsurvivor]

Do you have a routine at bedtime?  That is kind of key. I'm not perfect but it's usually bath, PJs, milk, books, and then bed.

I couldn't get myself to do co-sleeping until my daughter was like 8 or 9 months.  I was just too scared and even now (20 months), I don't sleep very well.  I move around a lot and my daughter moves around a lot.  We also have 2 big dogs, one of which sleeps in the bed.

The cosleeper is a good idea.  I didn't want to shell out for one, not knowing if it would work.  Fortunately we got one handed down to us from a friend.  I notice on Yahoo's freecycle network there's a lot of free baby stuff.

I know so well about having to go back to work.  I don't know how I was going to work and getting up every hour.  It eventually came to a head at work when my dd was 14/15 months and we hired a sleep consultant and did CIO.  I had gotten some improvement prior to that with Elizabeth Pantley's no-cry sleep solution.

[sombrabella]

I co-sleep with my 4 month old son. I was also really scared at first, but after going so many nights without sleep, you eventually do whatever works just to survive. I don't sleep very well most nights. My son is a really restless sleeper, waking up every couple hours and wanting to nurse. I think he is nursing to pacify himself more than for hunger. The worst part is that I have been sleeping on the couch instead of our bed because our bed is only a full size and my DH is a big guy...I really miss sleeping with him, and, eh-hem...other things 

As for naps, my boy is getting REALLY stubborn...he used to let me put him in the bassinet and would sleep for 45 mins, then he had to sleep in my arms, and now he will barely even stay asleep for 20 mins in my arms. So frustrating. He gets so hyperactive when he's tired that he can't let himself relax. I actually got out his swaddling wrap and put it on him today out of desperation. It worked okay but I still had to hold him and he still woke up in the middle of his nap.