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Jill’s Story: Having a High Need Twin

I am a mom of 11 1/2 month old twin daughters and one of my twins is what I would call a high need baby. I was so excited to be having my daughters but quickly realized that my life was going to be more complicated than I ever expected.

My daughters were born 4 weeks early and spent almost a full month in the hospital. We live in a smaller community so were away from home which made things more stressful than I ever expected. While in the hospital, we found out that Keri but not Kenzie was lactose intolerant. I had no idea what I was in for once we got home.

The girls did not want to sleep in their own beds so for the first couple of months they were home my husband and I each took one of the girls and slept with them. When they were 3 months old, they seemed fine to be in their own beds and even slept through the night some nights.

Then something strange happened. Kenzie (the older twin) started sleeping through the night and Keri did not. Keri was getting up any where from 1 – 10 times a night. The only way they would go to sleep was if we were holding them and usually feeding them their last bottle was what it took. Neither of them would self-soothe.

I was worried at how many times I was getting up at night. I made an appointment with a Pediatrician and found out that he felt Keri was high-strung. We tried everything we could think of. We read books. We talked to other parents. No one else seemed to be going through what we were.

I just recently started back at work and the girls started daycare. The girls started out fine, then after the first few days, Keri became difficult. After a week, our daycare told us that they could not care for our daughters and we had two weeks to find other arrangements. This is where I stand now; less than two weeks to find a daycare and not sure where to turn.

My mother has kindly offered to watch the girls when she can until I find something else. I feel so alone most days because there really isn’t much help out there for mom’s that deal with high needs babies. I wish any mother who has a high need baby the best of luck.

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