Note: This post was recently written by one of the moms in our private Facebook group. I couldn’t have said it better myself! This is shared here with her permission.
So in these past short 3 months, I’ve started creating a list of things/tips, etc. that only fellow mamas/parents of high needs babies will understand. If you’re one of those parents… then you will understand the following:
High need babies don’t sleep. Their naps consist of a long blink. Then bam. Awake.
Why? Because our high need babies will never let you stop moving. They need consistent movement.
Why? Because our high need babies don’t tolerate being put down. You can fight it all you want but it’s easier to just accept it. Your life is doomed. Always holding this baby. Babywearing becomes your best friend.
Why? See number three. We can’t even get a second to pee.
These high need babies don’t give a crap about sleeping in their own bed. And especially since they wake up all the time, it’s just easier to give in.
You see something that you think might help your high baby. Maybe a toy. A swaddle. A blanket., etc. It will be here in 24 hours thanks to Amazon Prime! Score.
Editor’s note: ‘Nuff said?
Why? Because high need babies HATE their car seats. And I mean despise. You would think you were poking them with hot daggers. Nope…be prepared to develop anxiety over going anywhere that includes a car seat!!
Because if you walk away from a high need baby the shit will hit the fan. Buy many bouncy seats. One for the kitchen. One for the family room. One for the bathroom. Etcetera. Because you will forever be taking your high need baby everywhere you go.
A really good pair. A high need baby doesn’t cry. Oh no: They scream. Like a blood curdling scream. Like a hyena kinda. And it’s always a scream. They go zero to a hundred in .0005 seconds. Be ready.
It’s a hard road. Every day is difficult. You want to give up. You ask, “Why me?” There is no answer. It’s just the hand we were dealt. Another tip.. don’t listen to anyone that hasn’t had a baby like this or been around one.
I promise you.. these high needs babies do exist. Very much so. Don’t let anyone tell you it’s your fault. Or you’re spoiling them. Or anything else that you “should” or “could” be doing. Because I promise you… I never thought babies could truly be like this. Until I had one.
Be prepared to lose a lot of friends because they don’t understand why you can’t go anywhere or hang out and just “bring your cute little baby”. Be prepared for people to judge you. Offer to these said people to come babysit your high needs baby for an hour.
They will then see why this list exists!!!!
It’s easy to feel overwhelmed and resentful when you have a high need or spirited child. No one ever tells you parenting can be THIS hard! If you’re looking for practical strategies for parenting a high need child, or just reassurance that what you’re going through is normal, you might be interested in my new ebook, The Fussy Baby Survival Guide.
Stop Crying, Calm Down, and Other Things We Tell Our High Need Kids
How to Distract a High Need Baby or Toddler
“Why are You So Tired?”: Here’s Why New Moms Are Walking Zombies
Top 10 Survival Tips For Parents of High Need Babies
Getting Things Done with a Fussy Baby
Coping with the Stress of Colic